What others say...

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In this moment, I can feel it clearly again… anger? despair? Sadness over the fact that there are too many toxic people? Maybe all of this is true at the same time and the truth lies exactly here.

For far too long, I have observed and experienced this myself… toxic people. People who, through their destructive behavior, consciously or unconsciously wear others down. No matter where we go, there is almost always at least one person who looks at us strangely or dislikes us. We call them toxic; I call them destructive and manipulative. Those experiences left a sharp impression on me.

Have you heard the saying, "you are too good for this world"? It is often said to people who uphold moral values. I, too, am an advocate of morality because it shapes life. Think about it… why are there so many prejudices? Competition is the beginning to all of this. These are behaviors that harm people. Why are so many young people afraid of presentations, conversations, or being in front of an audience? Because they were not taught differently, for years, they were poisoned by harmful environments. A different perspective: why does bullying exist? Because bullies often see others, usually those they target, as a potential threat who could be better than them. On top of that comes the constant background of negative thoughts that each of us carries. This is a dangerous combination that often leads to mental health issues and low self-esteem.

Experiences I often had included suppression and envy. I remember once in art class I got a good grade and I still remember how the student at the other table overreacted and asked the teacher why I had received a good grade and he had not. Her answer was: "Why didn't you do what she did?" I admire my teacher for it. Why should we envy others when we can also implement good ideas ourselves? There are people who are richer than I am, more popular than I am, or excel in something else more than I do – do I really have to hate them for it? On the contrary, we should be happy to see others happy. "Those who bring good into the world also receive good in return."

It is the same as saying: "I do not go out because I am afraid something will happen to me" or "Women are to blame if they are attacked by a stalker for wearing a short skirt." In my eyes, this is harmful thinking. Everyone has the right to move freely, everyone should wear what she/he wants as long as they feel comfortable in it. For some, a showgirl costume may seem erotic, but for me it is theatrical and an expression of art. And without any ulterior motives, these things should also appear normal, as they actually are. No one should be reduced because of their appearance or clothing – I find that despicable.

How do we counter this?

1. Avoid toxic people and limit contact to a healthy level. We do this by setting clear boundaries and being confident.

2. Inner stability. "I am perfect the way I am." By starting to think: "We should stop living in a society that values what others think of you more than what you think of yourself." This is a perfect summary of what we see every day in our society. It is destructive and unhealthy for every one of us.

3. What do you say?

There are countless other ways, whether spiritual, through meditation or healthy practices. But I find reflection and self-awareness most important. This post is a topic close to my heart because I see people breaking down every day under this false construct, and I want to help to find a little more of themselves again.